1."Which would you rather be...divinely beautiful or dazzlingly clever or angelically good?" - Anne Shirley
2. What is real happiness?...It is when you feel fine even if there is nothing left in your pocket...It is when you enjoy life inspite of the problems you have...And most of all,when you still know how to smile and thank God for His blessings even if you are the poorest person and has the least important job on earth...
3. ♥ Before Marriage ♥
Boy: At last i can Hardly wait!
Girl: Do you want me to leave?
Boy: No don"t even think about it!
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Of course, always!
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: No, why are you asking?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every chance i get
Girl: Will you slap me?
Boy: Hell no, are you crazy?!
Girl: Can I trust you?
Boy: Yes!
Girl: Darling!!
♥ After marriage - Just read it backwards!!
4. Money cannot buy happiness but it's more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
5. To all the girls who are in a hurry to have a boyfriend or get married, a piece of Biblical advice: “Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz." While you are waiting on YOUR Boaz, don't settle for any of his relatives; Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheating-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az, Cheap-az, Locked-up-az, , Goodfornothing-az, Lazy-az, and especially his third cousin Beatinyo-az. Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz...
6. Hope is hearing the melody of the future. Faith is to dance it.
7. October 2011 has 5 Saturdays, 5 Sundays and 5 Mondays. This happens once every 823 years. This is called money bags.
8. “I have reservations with the results. If the only basis is the Q and A portion, after having been trimmed down to 5, Ms. Philippines deserved to win. What made her different from the rest is that she had no seconds to rethink of her answer as she had no interpreter to break the ice. The rest had their interpreters and having breaks on seconds to think about their answers. Hands down, Ms. Philippines answered straight to the point.”
9. Don't take life too seriously. No one gets out alive.
10. How to please a woman:
Love her, die for her, take her to dinner, buy her jewelry, be interested in what she has to say.
How to please a man:
Show up naked. Bring beer.
11. Facebook should add a "who cares" button beside "like"
12. Officiating priest to newlyweds: I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now update your Facebook status.
13. Welcome to Facebook. The place where relationships are perfect, liars believe their own bullshit, and the world shows off they are living a great life; where your enemies are the ones that visit your profile the most, your friends and family block you, and even though you write what you are really thinking, there is always someone that takes it the wrong way.
I like number five. There's something to be said for quality over quantity.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed these. Especially 10 :-)
ReplyDeleteOh my word, loved the marriage thing and as for the Boaz clip, very funny and just what I needed to perk me up today!
ReplyDeleteHilarious! I like your style. So much that you brought out of FB that many can immediately identify but never realised.
ReplyDeleteJane Austen is always an inspiration. She writes simple English. That I like. Thanks for sharing!
Hank
Good stuff! Number 10 is my fav as well. Happy T13!
ReplyDeleteTotally funny. Loved 5, 10 and 13!
ReplyDeleteThese are so clever! Maybe my mind is especially flexible but I like #2 and #4 best. And I wish FB had a "don't like" button.
ReplyDeleteYikes. I have seen many of these on my FB page. Some are very witty, others eyebrow raising. It is fun to read them all in one place like this.
ReplyDeleteA very funny collection, loved 3.
ReplyDelete